POWER OF POP FILM THE MARVELS IS THE DUMBEST MCU MOVIE SINCE QUANTUMANIA!

THE MARVELS IS THE DUMBEST MCU MOVIE SINCE QUANTUMANIA!

The Marvels

The Marvels. What a misnomer. Originally conceived as the sequel to the commercially successful Captain Marvel, Bree Larsen’s Carol Danvers has been relegated to team member, equal with the teenage Iman Vellani’s Ms. Marvel (introduced in her own Disney+ streaming TV series) and Teyonah Parris’ Monica Rambeau (who gained her light-based powers by walking through a Hex barrier. Hmm). If you keep your expectations, you might survive this silly illogical Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU) vehicle. Thankfully, it’s relatively short – under two hours. Whew!

To be fair, the premise of The Marvels is interesting, in a madcap way. “Danvers gets her powers entangled with those of Kamala Khan and Rambeau, forcing them to work together to save the universe.” (IMDb.com) Oh, Khan is Ms. Marvel, by the way.

Basically, every time any two of the trio use their powers at the same time, they switch places! Zany, no? Sure. At least the first act gets pretty fun and works as a different way of introducing characters to each other, just don’t analyse when the switches happen and when they don’t. Stop thinking! But wait! Save the universe from whom? The villain of the piece is Dar-Bann, a non-descript Kree warrior (?) who discovers a macguffin that will save her dying planet but at the expense of other worlds. Wait! the Kree homeworld is dying? Since when? How come no other MCU movie has ever mentioned this??? Again, don’t ever think about how this process actually works, cuz it makes no sense whatsoever.

Okay. So eventually the Marvels (unofficial name) get together to stop Dar-Bann. Lots of plot to be unravelled and though the events come think and fast, it’s dumb. Nothing ever makes sense. Look, I have seen every MCU film and TV series, and too much of the story left me scratching my head. I pity the “normals” trying to make sense of this! 

All right then, maybe we can get into the characters so we can root for them, notwithstanding the silly narrative? No luck there. Danvers is as unlikeable as ever and Rambeau is dull as dishwater, so it’s left to the pixie charm of Khan to distract the viewer now and then, from the harsh reality that the movie is stupid and boring.

The Marvels has no saving grace. Not even the previously exciting set-ups at the end and in the post-credit scene can fill even the most diehard MCU zombie with anticipation! Avoid, or wait for it to stream on Disney+. Ho hum.

Out now in the cinemas.

… still there’s more …